Valentine’s Day is a contrived occasion for gift giving and candy eating. You are expected to give greeting cards to people with whom you would not share a meal, and give gifts to family members just to give them something. Humbug!
My wife doesn’ t understand my reticence to join in Valentine’s activities. I try to explain that I pay homage to her with gifts on Christmas, birthdays, Mother’s Day, and anniversaries. Buying Valentine’s gifts is just another Madison Avenue marketing invention.
Today, I was feeling a bit different about the occasion. My wife and I planned a visit to our daughter’s house to see our grandchildren, and she planned on getting some cupcakes for the kids. My assignment was to go to the super market for Valentine cards and balloons. That was OK with me, and I felt comfortable with her plans not violating my sacred rules of Valentine behavior.
After getting a sub-sandwich from the store’s deli to take home for lunch, I found the greeting card isle packed with people frantically grabbing cards off the shelf. I managed to find cards for my grandson, granddaughter, daughter, and wife. Then, I was stuck.
There were no son-in-law cards!
I could not go to my son-in-law’s house and give everybody a card but him. I could get one for a son, but that would not be appropriate.
Beseeching a nice looking lady for help, I said, “Have you seen any son-in-law cards? I need something nice, but not real sweet.” I was trying to keep things in perspective. That’s about the time my eyes found a card for Daughter and Son-In-Law. Problem solved!
See how frustrating Valentine’s Day can be? Once you buy into getting cards, candy, balloons, or other stuff for one person, you have to do it for everybody. It is a slippery slope.
As I waited in the check-out line for Shirley, the cashier, a line of ladies burdened with cards, flowers, candy, and cakes was forming behind me. They seemed to be glaring at me, and I got the feeling I didn’t belong in that line.
As Shirley finished with me, I was relieved to be leaving that place, and sweetly said to Shirley and the ladies in line, “Happy Halloween!”
I hate Valentine’s Day.