If The Post Office Goes Out Of Business…

Do I still need that mailbox on my curb? Why, of all times, is the US Postal Service talking about curtailing service? Last weekend, I had to install a new mailbox, and now am suffering from the leaning mailbox syndrome.

You see, it all started with my concern about a couple of pine trees that were next to my driveway. In Georgia pines are not considered real trees, but more like weeds in the tree family. You cannot get rid of the things, and when a good wind comes along they are likely to fall on your house or car. Even with insurance, you are still in for a world of hurt with your insurance company as you try to get new dining tables, carpets and china out of a pine tree experience.

So, I contracted with a fly-by-night tree company to get four pine trees out of my yard. When they finally showed up on a Saturday morning, they yanked my existing mailbox out of the ground, and propped it against the garage door because it was in their way. My precious mailbox had been in the ground for twenty years doing its job. It was partially rotted, and did not re-install very well.

In my estimation those tree guys cheated me out of at least two years worth of mailbox life before I had to replace it. My trashy looking mailbox was the subject of some controversy in the neighborhood, but I refused to go all decorative. I was going for the mailbox longevity record.

I went to Home Depot and had a pow-wow with a clerk who was an expert on mailbox installations. I was anti-digging and anti-concrete. Lazy was a word to describe my attitude. My new mentor went right along with the idea, and I wound up with a no-dig mailbox post, along with a new black, shiny mailbox. All I had to do was to drive a steel stake into the ground, and fit the top of the stake into a pre-drilled hole in the bottom of the  new wooden post.

Yeah, sure.

Equipped with hammer and level, I commenced the job. Let me say that there is no way to keep a steel stake perfectly vertical while pounding the hell out of the thing with a hammer. Plus, the heavy cedar post seems to make up its own rules when it comes to a lean/no-lean attitude.

Yep! My new mailbox leans to one side. Of course, this is extremely embarrassing because all my neighbors have nice, perfectly vertical mailboxes with cute little wrought iron or otherwise decorative posts. Gheeez!  What a bunch of anal retentive perfectionists.

I guess I will have to wait another twenty years to replace this mail box, or the US Postal Service can just go out of business and I can yank the damned thing out of the ground.

3 thoughts on “If The Post Office Goes Out Of Business…”

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